Dear Katy Lee and I do mean DEAR Katy Lee. Thank you for your honesty and openness to responding to my cry about pain and ups and downs with struggling to understand myself my daughter and how we interact grow separate come together and on it goes.
I wondered about what goes on inside my daughter's head about being adopted and asked her this time when she was around if she always wondered why the people who gave birth to her didn't raise her and she said YES she did...and all the times when I explained that they were 14 and 16 and the dad was in jail meant nothing...she still could not get it out her of her head that they didn't raise her...now that she is in their lives it probably does not matter because her circle is connected again...it is hard for me because they are very dangerous people with mounds of social problems like alcohol and drug abuse and abusing and neglecting children cheating on significant others and literally taking whatever they want when they want so it breaks my heart that her kids are being exposed to that lifestyle too...but she wrote in the note when she left that she likes the "unpredictable" and often communicated that the safe life we raised her in was boring...having written that Katy I thank you for reaching out to me in my dark time to let me know that she does love me and that is real...the sad part is the feelings of rejection because now they come from me and they are similar to her anger over wondering why THEY didn't raise her...I am wondering WHY she doesn't want to be a part of my life and let me be a part of hers...
Thank you...hugs and love and respect and admiration.
Lynn
