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Hey, Brown! I just read through this thread. I have a couple disconnected thoughts... (Hey it's Sunday, my "day of work" and I'm definitely not responsible for the state of my mind...Ok, I hear you saying "How is that different from other times?")
First, give her a head's up. Tell her you're going to call her on ___ at ____ o'clock. (She can choose to be there or not, or she can email you.) Don't ask her what will suit; make an annoucement.
I don't think you can do an end run around ampm at this point. If DD chooses to have you as her "friend" on her myspace, that's different.
I think the only thing worse for a girl than being 14 is being 16, LOL. At that age, my daughter would tell me (when she was talking to me) that she wished she was adopted. (What I "love" is that now she will tell me she thinks I did a good job raising her.) It is often difficult for moms as their children start moving toward adulthood and away from dependence on their parents. It's not an easy time for most of us. (My mother in later used used to tell us how she loved it when we were teens. My siblings and I would look at each other and try to figure out what teens she was talking about!) It sounds to me like amom may be dealing with some of the teen stuff and her reaction to it. Is DD the youngest? That might make it even harder.
Hang in there. I know it feels like forever right now but it may be a short time in terms of a lifelong relationship. Just keep being there...
From what D has told me, D's teenage years were rough. If I had entered his life then, he might totally rejected me (in reaction to his sense of me "not wanting him.")
No real answers her... know that you have support from those of us who care about you and your journey!
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