[hkolln]

We'll be adopting our 8 yr old niece whom has been living with us for 9 months now as a foster child from another state. Her biomom (my husbands half sister) was in prison for 19 months for drugs and just recently was paroled in Idaho. While our niece was living with us her biomom has been writing to her from prison and I have been writing back to keep her updated on her daughters progress and transition with us. Because of the ICPC issues we are encountering we are still awaiting the finalization of the adoption. Biomom voluntarilly TPR'd back in August and biodad was TPR'd by default.

Now that biomom is out of prison she has been calling asking for times to call her daughter. I don't trust her because she has a track record of doing drugs and has never cleaned herself up, even after losing her daughter once at a much younger age. Yeah she cleaned herself up just enough to get her daughter back and then went back to drugs and back with a violent man.

My husband and I are torn between do we allow a visit in June when we go to visit our other relatives or do we not. Our niece is doing very welll with us..no major issues and everything seems to be fine. She is also going thru therapy too which is helping her alot. We want to do what is best for our niece (she has a very close bond with her Mom) however we want to protect her also from anything negative that may happen. Has anyone had to deal with this? My concern is my SIL will find someone to come with her and take her daughter...she is very unstable and emotional on the phone when we speak. How do you decide as far as visitation goes with a family member when you know they aren't that much of a positive role model as you hoped?