Gosh, I'm so sorry Doinit. It hurts like hell doesn't it? From one who's been there....you will get better. It's been a year since I found out my son is deceased and I'm finally starting to get better. Yes, it's taken a year.
You do what's in your heart, but I'd go straight for the kitten-caboodle. Call that young widow. She just might need a friend. You two share a bond, a great loss, but perhaps you can help each other and become lifelong friends. This is what I wish for you.
If you want to call pm me and I'll be happy to give you my number. My email is
kdecrow@mac.com
Kim