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Originally Posted by feelingreyt
Just curious.....has your nephew been in the same foster home for 9 months? Just wondering how attached he is to them and what their take is on all this. Are they wanting to adopt him, if possible?
Also, does he know you and your family? 2 yrs old is still a very young age. I would not let the fact that is not a newborn affect your decision.
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Wow thank you for the encouragement and the stories.
I am trying to be some what careful of what I post since this is a public forum but it is hard to get answers to your questions if your not sort of point blank:-)
Is there anything that I should know about that isn't allowed or ethical to post on these boards to protect identities? Can you tell I'm really new to all of this? lol
I would feel terrible if she new I was posting all of this but then again I really feel that anyone who has been in my shoes right now may be able to help us fill in the gaps that can help us figure all of this out.
I am in the process of finding out what the situation is with the foster family. I found out today that he has actually been in foster care for 14 months, I thought he was in foster care for 5 months then back with his mom then back into foster care. I thought he had been with the same family for nine months. When I talked to the case worker today she said she would need a release from my sister before she could speak to me. But she made mention of him being in foster care for 14 months and made mention of how long he was with the same family but I missed what she said. I asked the worker if they had an interest in adopting him and she said since the plan has always been reunification and since she didn't have a release yet she could not answer that. I spoke to my sister today and she said she thought the foster family would be interested in adopting him. I knew her first child well, he was adopted and I now have no contact with him. Her second child is with her dad (he has full custody) I still have a relationship with her and her has a relationship with her little brother. I have no relationship with her little brother, my nephew as he has been with my sister such a small amount of time.
His age is not one of our considerations, it is more about
how will taking him effect our children not so much because of him but because of his mom being more involved in our life and what stress she may bring with her or cause to her son that would effect the family, If we took him of course we would consider him as one of ours as well and how to protect him and keep boundaries with his mom is a hard thing to imagine dealing with. We will take into consideration if the foster family wants him. This is why I did not interfere with the first child's adoption, the family that was his foster family wanted him and he had been with them a very long time and loved him. I explained this to my sister today and explained that if this is the same situation I will have a very hard time with the concept that taking him out of a home he is used to will be good for him. She said she still wants us to have him because we are family and she gave some other reasons as well. I do not think I could do that to him if they want him. There is a lot to take into consideration and me don't have all the facts yet. This should become clearer over time. I am waiting on the worker to get the release, my husband and I are going to see a counselor regarding all of this and hopefully day by day we will become clearer on the whole situation.
Thanks again for your replies.