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I think it's so important to remember in open adoption that bmom has her pain and her loss and while you need to be empathetic towards her and that, it's not your fault that she is hurting. The loss and gain can be seperate from the actual relationship, not adoption as a whole, but the relationship between the parents. Does that make sense?
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Tara May
Momma to Piper December 22, 2008
Open Adoption Birthmother to T. February 13, 2000 
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