[litlbear6886]

I am a reunited adoptee, who has, I believe, a unique three way relationship with my mothers. My mothers have taken their common love of me and formed a true friendship of their own. My amom has even told me that she's no longer afraid of losing her daughter, because a "sister" would never do that to her. I was very lucky in the fact my amom was very supportive of my search, and continues to support the relationship I have with Mama Joan. Not all adoptees get that support, but there is no need to find blame. Imagine the afamily's feelings; it's terrifying to let your child go find their bfamily. My amom was able to tell me honestly how she felt, but still had the strength to give me her blessings in my search. Her insecurities and fears were there; that after I found Mama Joan, that I would connect and not want to come back. She was afraid that the bond of motherhood would be so strong that she would no longer have a daughter. I am very fortunate; not all aparents are as able to do that. Just because they aren't able to is no reason to condemn them. In the same situation, I don't know if I would have the strength to overcome that fear.

Growing up, I was told many times how much I looked like my afather's family. Every time my father's friends and business people would see me with him the first time, all commented A LOT about how I favored him, and they could "see where I got my looks". When Dad and I were feeling ornery, we would give each other a LOOK and then announce I was adopted. It was our thing to do, and we loved the look on people's faces when we told them. My Dad always had such a proud look on his face though, and always felt like my resembling him had a direct connection with my happiness with my family. I feel like I, being completely comfortable with my environment, adapted to fit, maybe. To this day, if I didn't know I was adopted, would still think I look uncannily like my afather's mother.