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No, Mom died in 1991 and Dad died in 2001. I first tried to search in 1987, and had to fly to Arizona for their permission - it was a scene very much like Tim Green's in A Man and His Mother. They were supportive, though it was obviously distressing to them. But they understood the need for medical information so that I and their grandchildren would benefit.
Yes, Dorothy was unwed. She lived with her sister until close to delivery, I believe, so she was spared some of the horrors of a Catholic home for unwed mothers; she was raised Methodist, so perhaps the nuns couldn't lay too much guilt upon her. Her parents were unaware at the time of the birth, as they were out of state. She did marry and have two children a few years after me, though her husband died in 1994 and she now lives alone; her other son lives in Florida and my sister may be in the Kansas City area where Dorothy and I both live. I am assuming none of them knew of me, and that may be one reason why she has not responded. I would take my sister's advice and give her lots of time (it took her a year to respond to her surrendered daughter's initial contact) but in this case, I don't want to read Dorothy's obituary in the paper next summer and kick myself for not making an attempt sooner - age is a factor here, I feel.
I don't think I'll have issues with loyalty to my adoptive parents - I waited until they were gone to resume my search after the initial effort foundered on Missouri law. But I do wish they were still here for this - I would like to have their support, and I also wish Dorothy had an opportunity to meet them.
I really believe one of my motives for reunion is to give Dorothy forgiveness and thank her for doing what she did for me; I did get a great family to grow up in. I worry that she may have suffered from this, and I want her to know I don't feel she had anything to be ashamed of. I guess I would like to ease any fears or guilt she might still bear - and I told her that in my letters.
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