[nowwhat1981]

So, I found your story encouraging because I am going through a similar dilemma myself. I was adopted at birth and recently found my birthmother via an online search. However, she made it all-too-clear that she did not want to be found and only answered my questions because she assumed I put a lot of time and money into it and that it was the least she could do. She also has been very hesitant about giving me any information on my brother, who, as public record clearly proves, shares the same parents as me.

My birthmother decided that he is not ready to deal with this whole thing (which I think is a little unfair, given he is 24 and probably unaware of the whole situation) and kind of left it at that. So I am left wondering, if I do contact him, will it be perceived as me going behind her back? Can I, responsibly, do that to him? Is my desire to know him more important than his right to normalcy / his concept of who he is & his family history? If anything, we can update each other on this whole thing...always nice to have someone know what you're going through...especially with being adopted, as it seems to be one of those things that is hard to relate to unless you are actually going through it yourself.

I'm eager to hear how the situation with your bsister turns out. Best wishes.