I don't know about dealing with the RAD to the exclusivity of everything else, but it does need to be addressed. At age 12 you're getting close to the teen years and the child wanting to naturally become independent, and that can make attachment even more difficult. I'd want to start working on the attachment issues right away. Talk therapy is a waste of time for a child with attachment issues - they've got to be able process the traumas (including abandonment) that they have been through. Talk therapists, including psychiatrists, base their work on a relationship with the child - if a child has attachment issues, the child can't form that relationship with them to start with! Our son even conned the first "attachment therapist" because all she did was the talk stuff - he knew that, so he was able to keep her at bay so that they never got to the painful stuff that he needed to work on - we lost two precious years there. I'm still amazed at how much of the "mainstream" counseling and psychiatric world knows so little about RAD and how to successfully treat it. Check out
Attachment Disorder information and support at ATTACh.org. - they are the main organization for attachment therapists in the U.S. and have a list of standards that must be met by the therapist to belong to their organization. Nancy Thomas also has a list of parent-recommended attachment therapists on her website:
Attachment Disorder | Nancy Thomas Parenting | Attachment.org | Reactive Attachment Disorder.
Welcome to Attachment & Trauma Network* - ATN also has a list of therapists.
good luck - and keep posting!
Fran