|
okay this is what i did
i wrote a generic letter
stating the following
i put the birthdaughter and the partents name
then i told them my name and explaining that i did not want to cause any problems
i also included all my contact information
and said that i was willing to answer any questions. and signed it as a friend.
then i read it back to my mother and she said it was cold
no feelings, not me at all. and then asked why did i not tell her how i feel, how long i have been searching ?? i tried to tell my mom that this was more less like just opening the door and getting my foot in and not getting the door slammed in my face, if i was to write all the feeling i could scare her and the parent and i dont want to do that, plus i dont even know if the daughter lives there she could be going to college. and i dont want the parent to feel threatened by me.
i know you all said to write to the daughter first and i wanted to, but i put myself in the adoptive parents shoes and if i was the adoptive parent i would not mind getting my letter and sharing ,but i did put the birthdaughters name first. and i put a self addressed and stamped envelope inside.
i have also started another letter just for the BD. i may not get to send now but at least i will have it for when she is ready to have contact.
now here comes the part i am the worst at , the WAITING
it will drive me crazy i will be waiting to meet the mailwoman everyday. and since we have 3 phone lines, i will make sure not to miss a call and every fax that comes across i will be there , every email i will have to check before deleting and leave the cell phones on. i said in my letter that i can be reached 24 hours and i would not want to miss this at all.
i think you are all the greatest
thank you so much for your ideas and opinions, they helped me out a lot
i dont know how i would have handled it without you all helping me.
if i would have done it the way i wanted to i would have sent a couple of notebooks of letters that i had written to them both over the years. could you imagine getting books of all these strange persons feelings and thoughts .so i will save those notebooks for another time.
so they should get the letter saturday the 8th and i figure i might hear something in the begining of april.
|