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Interesting idea
I'm an adoptee and my adoption has never been a secret around me. It wasn't something I put on my resume but it wasn't anything I hid. I guess I never thought about the implications of all that happened - to me, it just explained how my family came to be my family. It wasn't until after my reunion with both bparents, that I realized that the fact of me was a huge secret - that even now, 50 years later, can cause embarassment for them. They are both open but certainly any time they explain me, they are confessing to "sins" from the distant past. It was astonishing to me that they even want to be a part of my life after realizing this. I listened as my bmom told about me to others and was amazed at the personal questions that people felt were ok to ask - since they knew her big secret. I know the reactions that they have both had from others has ranged the spectrum from embarassment to interest to emotional support.
For my bmom, she had given up the secret years ago to close friends. But in her own hometown, for most of her adult life, she said that the secret of me was the elephant in every room.
Very interesting - it particularly caught my eye because I was born in 1956.
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