[5jellybeans]

I am new to this board but I am looking for a place to find people who understand what I am going through. We have 5 children ages 14,10,7,5 and 3. We adopted the oldest when he was only 18 months old and never had any attachment issues. We birthed the next 2. Then we have adopted the 2 youngest recently. They are biologically half brothers and have always been together. To make this long story shorter, they both have RAD. We were misinformed by the placing agency (county DFCS in another state) when we asked about their ability to attach. They said they were normally attached to foster parents and should easily attach to us.
It took about a year before I decided that their behaviors were not normal adjusting to a new family. By that time the adoptions were finalized. We now have an attachment therapist and are starting the hard work. My oldest children are suffering terribly. The crying and the defiance, the nonsense talking, the food issues, the hypervigilance and the rages have taken their toll on 3 super kids. They want desperately to love their new brothers but just can't.
We are in this for the long haul. We feel like God sent these boys to us and we intend to help them heal. We are getting counseling for EVERYONE so we can all make it through together. Is there anyone out there who has helped siblings with RAD heal? Our therapist says they have a trauma bond and probably should have been placed separately but we have what we have and now we must move forward. I just need the best info I can get on helping them (they are different even in their presentation of RAD) both at the same time.
Thanks for listening to our story. -Jill