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dvalentine - I agree with so many of the earlier posts. I am a birthmom. I was 17 when my son was born. I have been through a lot of what you named. My parents gave me passive-aggressive support that ended up with my child being placed with my dad's cousin. It's a huge mess. I wish I would have fought them. I was deluded to think turning 18 would give me some rights, and I could get my son back. (it was only 3 weeks later). None of that was true, and 19 years later, I can tell you this incident was the biggest mistake of MY life. The duress I felt by my parents or by making the prospective adoptive parents happy did not matter at all. If you think you can do it - GO FOR IT. There are resources to help you raise your child. Your family will likely get over it. In my opinion, families have one set of actions for their embarrasment caused by their single-pregnant teenager and another for the sweet little baby.
I do not think you should concern yourself with the fact that there have been 3 showers for the prospective adoptive mother. Things happen. There have been plenty of pregnant women that do not even have showers until their child is born because they know very sad things can and do happen, and they do not want to have the joy of the shower until they have the child. For them to "jump the gun" so to speak should not pressure you.
Many mothers have said they either could not have other children or have decided not to have other children after their placement experience. If that is a concern of yours, I think you need to think about that too.
This should be all about what is best for your baby and for you. Nothing else matters. The resources for you to care for your child are out there, it may just be logistics in connecting with them.
Good luck to you!!!!!
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