[lucyjoy]

I'm sure you are exhausted from not sleeping which makes things all the more frustrating, but please look at this as being a terrified child who can't communicate her needs rather then a behavior problem.

For the sake of survival of all, take turns sleeping. If you want her to sleep in her room, YOU take a mat or cot into her room and sleep their for awhile until she feels safe. Otherwise, put her in your room. Or, start her in your room and when she comes into yours, settle her in a sleeping bag or on a cot and let her sleep out the night there.

Once she gets to where she can feel safe, she'll sleep better.

I'm not sure from your postings if you are able to fully communicate with your child yet or not. If so, are you working on bonding aspects during waking hours? Is it possible to get a therapist involved? Even if the child cannot communicate with the therapist, an attachment therapist can still help YOU to facilitate attachment and help you deal with issues that come up in a way that will help your child know how to use her language to tell you what she needs instead of her behaviors.

Locking her in her room will only create more terror, less trust, and interfere with bonding.