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Originally Posted by mommy_2b_NC
I'm sure the answer to my question is on this board somewhere, but I could not find it with the keywords I used to search.
When a baby is exposed to drugs, are there some drugs that are less damaging than others? If we choose to do foster-adopt or straight adoption, I was wondering if there would be certain placements that maybe we should consider. I initially thought that I would not want to consider a baby with ANY drug exposure, but that would probably eliminate a lot of potentially healthy children.
For instance, are most babies that are exposed to say, cocaine in utero o.k. after birth and for the rest of their lives? Heroin, meth, etc.? Is there a list somewhere? FAS is a different story, right? Does testing positive at birth and having to go thru withdrawl make a difference?
I'm so new to this so thank you for your responses! Those of you that have adopted drug exposed children, I would LOVE to hear your personal adoption stories if you'd like to PM me.
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Both my children have some prenatal exposure to substance. I put it that way because we know for sure they were exposed to crack cocaine and alcohol at various levels and times while in utero. But at least from our experience, we still really don't know the full story about when and how much and what kind of substances were used. I'm relating that because when considering situations where prenatal exposure may be an issue, most especially when there is addiction involved (that is a disclaimer because I know that there are many women who drink before realizing they are pregnant...that is a completely different situation). So whatever you decide, you have to prepared for that possibility, for the unexpected and for the not-knowing.
That said, IMO it is more about timing and metabolism whether or not a certain substance causes harm. And prenatal nutrition and care as well as postnatal environment all factor in. I guarantee that with every story, you will not be able to find a standard or gauge for any of it. It just isn't there.
If it were me, and we were waiting to adopt again, we would consider most drugs except meth. Although some here have experience with it, for me, there wasn't enough longterm information regarding the effects of this drug on development.
And it should be noted that for the most part, if and when an illegal substance is used, it is most probably the case that alcohol was used on some level as well. And alcohol is probably the worst of all for known longterm effects.
There really is no way of knowing. It is a leap of faith. But then, isn't that parenting anyway? You have to determine the level of risk you are willing to consider and then look at each case on its own merit and make a decision. That is what we did and our agency was very willing to let us have time to make these decisions on a case by case basis (although it was incredibly hard to say "no" to any of them, but we had to...) and not force us to check a box and say yes or no on a form. They did this because they had few families willing to consider some of the more complex cases.
Another thing to consider is that no matter how a child does initially post-birth, there is no guarantee regarding development. In fact, from all the education and reading we have done, it became clear that until a child is of the age where they are making logical and independent decisions, the full effect may not be known. This usually does not occur before the teen years.
My kids are both amazing. DD is 3 (she'd say 3 3/4) and doing well. She did not go through withdrawal and we haven't seen any real effects we can identify as related to the prenatal exposure. She is brilliant (and I AM PREJUDICE!!!), very high-spirited and creative and doing very well both intellectually and socially. TWe do know that her exposure occurred early in pregnancy, ranging from the first 6 weeks to 20 weeks (several different stories about this).
DS is 19 months and a little fireball but we honestly aren't sure if it has anything more to do with personality and the fact he's nearly a 2yo boy! He had a very tough beginning. Although he did not test positive at birth, he went through withdrawal for the first 6 weeks and had some struggles with digestive problems and fighting numerous infections for the first six months. He was followed closely the first year by a developmental pediatrician and early intervention because he had some stiff muscle tone and other symptoms that indicated the possibility of cerebral palsy. He was late on many milestones but I think it was only because he likes to make those kind of decisions for himself, stubborn Little Man that he is! He is completely on par developmentally now and we are thrilled with his progress. He was exposed regularly during the first 5 months of the pregnancy and that we know of, at least twice the week before delivery.
Some resources that I have found helpful...
a booklist for issues related to prenatal exposure;
NIDA website which I found very helpful; contact a developmental pediatrician who specializes in prenatal exposure; contact your local early intervention program through your county health unit...they will have information; the library; and your agency may have some resources available...
Hope that helps...