Oceans- Again some very good information - Thank you
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As far as parents having no say, they shouldn’t and don’t – BUT – this has a HUGE impact on their life. They too can end up parenting (albeit in a more passive way) and they don’t have the right to sever ties with a child who is still a minor. There are financial considerations and at the end of the day, the chances of a good outcome are severely diminished without their support regardless of the choice. Parents struggle a great deal and deserve to be recognized, supported and above all, HEARD in this very complicated equation. My initial caution was to be very careful about interference (which you aren’t doing and I applaud).
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I do realize a grandchild coming too soon does have a GREAT impact. I stressed to April that she make sure SHE'S raising the child. As it is not her parents job to do so. I look at my son, if he were to become a father-OH MY WHAT WOULD I DO? - Well, support him on his decision and live each day as it comes, just as I do now. We raise our kids the best we know how and eventually they make their own decisions. Sometimes good, sometimes bad.
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2 – Printed this and had her read it: What You Should Know If You're Considering Adoption For Your Baby Again, we discussed her fears and concerns. Since I was a b-mom, I have some insights both good & bad.
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This is the pamphlet I already gave her. It is an awesome source.
The other sources you gave seem to be great. I will print them off and send them her way.
Thank you again for all your insight.
lonni-yeah, I do believe this is the April you've been hearing about. There were some very beautiful and heart touching letters, weren't there. I know I shed quite a few tears over them.
taramayrn-Prayers are always appreciated. Lord, knows these kids will need them. They have a ruff road ahead of them.
Just have to add that April and Chad are currently arguing.
I guess April has chosen a name and Chad doesn't like it. I was talking with Andrew, (my son) about it. I mentioned how both need to realize that they need to work as a team, they now have a child to consider. It's hard, it took Andrew's father and i a few years to let go of our anger towards each other and just think of Andrew. Now, heck we can go out for pizza and even took a trip together as friends. I suggested counceling for both on parenting and getting along.