Maybe not telling the MIL.. is part of the secrecy mode and shame mode.. and the “what have you done?” Mode..
I never told my MIL.. ha.. She and I never got on and I would not have given her the satisfaction of having ‘one up’ on me..
What crazy thinking.. she has been dead for a long time..
It takes a lot of bring it all out in the open.. IMO
Susan.. what you wrote rules..
Jackie