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Originally Posted by IzaksMom
Wow! All of these posts have helped a lot! Thank you so much. I am blessed to have an open adoption with my sons parents, which is why I would want to tell my children about their brother because I hope to continue to have an open relationship with his family long into the future. I have learned a lot from the examples given here. Thanks so much for everyone's replies. I feel much less stressed about the whole thing.
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As much as everyone is hoping for a good response, I would still advise caution or perhaps 'preparedness' would be a better way of expressing it. Perhaps telling ONE member of your husbands family and gauge their reaction, although I agree with Kune, it may be better coming from your husband. When I began telling my large community of friends and locals about my son (in reunion after 28 years apart) they were excellent, but, I was also aware that one single word or expression out of place and I would have gone to pieces. I think it would be good if you could imagine the worst case scenario and mentally prepare how you would answer any responses that would hurt you. Thats the advice I was given and I think its good advice.
Now, I can talk about T and some may ask 'who is T' and then I can explain, so I agree with another comment made (can't find it at the min) that using your child's name as casually as if your son was still in your life (which effectively HE IS because its an open adoption) will bring a casualness and a 'business as normal' kind of approach.
I hope this helps, because I know how I felt when it came to letting people know, and I just went into MELTDOWN!!! because of the sheer fear. I only had one reaction out of over a 170 people I told that felled me slightly .... it was... you didn't tell me you were married???? (LOL) noooo, my son was illegitimate......ooooohhh I didn't think you were like that........ Fortunately for me, by the time that remark arrived (and she did apologise profusely later) I had had so many good remarks and reactions that I was bathing and soothed by them all, particularly by those that share my faith, they were absolutely marvellous and they still keep asking me as to why I was so afraid to tell them and why I'd kept it a secret 28 years..... fear thats what! and also the stigma of those times....
(((hugs))) take a deep breath....
p.s. what is an LDS man??? thanks