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Mockingbird,
I'm glad you had such a great talk with your son! I hope they only get better!!
My advice comes from the perspective of an adoptee. Your son is 37. He has as much right to know his father as he does you. I completely understand that you want to protect him, and to keep him to yourself a bit. I can truly see why that would be important to you. That being said, for me, part of being adopted and considering reunion is getting all the pieces of the puzzle, and I'd want to know who my father is. That includes the negative information too, but I'd still want to know. I hope he gives you time. I think as adoptees we need to respect that these questions may bring up bad memories and we need to let you deal with the question. However; bdad is half of the equation, and I wouldn't want to wait long. I'm 40,and perfectly capable of taking what information I have and deciding what to do with it.
Good luck, and my advice may not be what's right for your situation. I imagine whatever you do you will do out of love, and most of the time, you can't go wrong there!
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