The questions raised and answered on this thread are a big part of why I joined this forum in the first place. I am a very sensitive and sometimes sarcastic person by nature. When people ask rude or inappropriate questions, I struggle with my responses. It can be VERY difficult to not be sarcastic. I am trying very hard to learn how to respond politley while still making my point clear. How I respond to these people is how my A-son will learn to respond to them. Sarcastic and shut-down responses were fine in the beginning, but now he's 19 months old now & understands so much of what is going on around him --- I really need to be careful with how I answer.
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Originally Posted by spaypets
The difference is that your family's business is private and you shouldn't have to discuss it with the world.
However, your child's adoptive status is his/her story and the child should be dealt with honestly right from the start. Just in the same way parents tell their bio children about the day they were born, so should children who were adopted be told their history. How his birthparents couldn't take care of any baby, how they searched for a family who could. How excited mommy and daddy were when they were chosen.
But that information is private--not secret--private and shouldn't be shared with the world at large.
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I whole heartedly agree with this post. How do you do it? How do you balance living an open adoption, being honest, yet maintaining privacy so that the adopted child can tell his/her own story? I feel like I'm the rope in a wild game of tug-of-war.
