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Originally Posted by KatiesEd-dad
The thing that bothers me in our case is that the our first mom's parents offered to help her parent and support her emotionally and financially until she finished college and was able to make it on her own. According to the her parents and our agency's pregnancy counselor , she wanted to have nothing to do with that.
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Obviously, I can't speak for your daughter's birth mom but I can share my experience here.
Sometime in the last few weeks leading up to the Munchkin's birth, my Mom offered to raise the Munchkin. I, obviously, did not take her up on her offer nor did I even bother to entertain the idea. While my research on adoption at the time of pregnancy was minimal due to lack of internet/etc, I knew enough to figure out that could create even bigger problems within our family. Looking back on it, I feel kind of bad that I didn't at least discuss it in detail with my parents. I, too, felt that I had disappointed them by getting pregnant. I'm able to see where those communication problems hindered any progress we could have made for either my parenting or keeping the Munchkin in family. But yeah.
I'm rambling. It's been a long week. Do forgive.
Since you've already written a letter, I'm afraid all you can do at this point is wait. It sucks, of course. I won't dispute that one! (I'm not exactly... patient!) I would encourage you not to try guessing, over and over again, what her reasons might or might not be. There are a bagillion reasons as to why she might not want contact and trying to guess will drive you bonkers.
I'm sorry you're dealing with this. I'm sorry your daughter will end up dealing with this as well. Hang in.