I reunited with my son, R, in Jan 2007, through a profile he posted on this web site two years prior. He is 36 now, married with three beautiful children. My husband and I flew cross-country to meet them in August, and spent nearly a week getting to know them (we stayed at a B&B close by).
Two months later, in October, R flew out to see us, and to meet his brother, sister, nephew, cousin, g-aunt and g-uncle. It was great, and we are already planning our visits for next year.
Initially, R waited to tell his amom about our finding each other until we had a chance to establish a relationship. He did tell both his amom and asis (his amom's biodaughter) before he flew out to meet his bfamily. Unfortunately, R's adad passed away shortly after we made contact and did not know of our reunion.
Since R's trip out here last month, his amom, asis and I have been in email contact. They both have welcomed me warmly, and have been very kind and accepting. Amom told me that she had been looking for me for a very long time, and asis also stated that her mom had been searching for me ever since she could remember.
We are still in the beginning stages of getting to know each other, but things are working out well and we are planning a multi-family reunion for next year, so we can all get to know one another even better. Perhaps things are working out well for us because R is a grown man with a family of his own, and there are no "ownership" issues, for lack of a better word. In fact, amom's first email to me had for the subject line: "R's other Mom" and I was deeply touched by that. She told R about me when he was young, she shared all the info about me that she had, and she helped him search for me.
It feels really comfortable... like all of us are getting more family members. Amom came from a very small family, who are now deceased. My extended family is huge, and we're excited that it's getting even bigger.
I've been searching around the forums for stories of successful relationships between all members of the triad, where the adoptee is now an adult and where the adoption had been from the closed era. I really haven't found any, though.
Are we all blazing trails here? Charting unknown waters? Is there anybody out there who has experienced post-reunion bonding between both families from the closed era? Does anyone have some experiences to share?
I never thought love could get so big...
Peace,
Susan
