Thread: 15 year old
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Old 02-18-2003, 12:10 PM
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debsdone debsdone is offline
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Wow, I am so sorry you are dealing with all this, I know how hard it is. I have issues with the comments that adoptees have these identity problems, I am an adoptee and the vast majority of adoptees I know have no such issues. In truth, I probably know more NON adoptee who have had identity issues, especially as teens. You ovbiously love your son, that isn't an issue that I can see. The very first and foremost thing here is to keep him safe and ALIVE! Drugs kill, as well you know. Rehab rarely starts out as what a person wants, but quite often, as time and sobriety go by, things begin to fall into place. My husband and I joined an organization called "Tough Love" when my daughter began acting out at 13. We needed to learn effective parenting, and we did. She was later diagnosed as having a personality disorder. She is now 25 and will tell anyone, in no uncertain terms, that the very strict boundries and very consistant parenting that we used are 100% responsible for her being alive today. She wasn't making the right choices, and sometimes the reasons aren't as important as stopping the behaviors. There is plenty of time to delve into the reasons later. First the kid has to get and stay clean, whatever it takes. Please fell free to pm me if you would like, I do understand how hard this is! Love, Debi
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