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My AS entered foster care at age 3, was diagnosed with RAD at age 6....didn't get ANY counseling, nothing along the way [actually was a note in his file that the FP wouldn't take him to counseling because it was too far - and he grew up in a major metropolitan area!] - and I believe, very little nurturing, certainly not the baby stuff he needed to catch up on, and was actually abused in more than one foster home. I often think wow, what we could have done with R if we'd been his first foster parents! (he's told us, too, that he wishes we could have been his first foster parents). R was 9 when he came to live with us - very clingy. I always say "skin to win"....appropriately of course. That has been R's biggest craving - skin to skin touch. This may sound extremely silly, even when he was 9 -10 he loved it when I would "blow raspberries" on his stomach - it was a fun mom-son interaction thing.
you have a great opportunity to help these kids with attachment right now....which hopefully will make a big difference for them as they get older.
Fran
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