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Honestly, Ember, I respected the "grilling" because it made me feel like A) DD's birth mom had really thought long and hard about alot of issues (ones I certainly hadn't!) and B) it allowed us to really get to know each other on a less than "superficial" level. People usually "present" really well in situations like this, but answers to really tough questions will give you the info that you may really be looking for (if you decide to place). The other thing to remember is that you don't have to do it all at once, kwim? I mean we met with DD's birth parents a few times before she was born. I also think seeing how someone parents, live and in person, may be the best "info" you can get.
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