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We tried for three years to adopt in the United States and became very frustrated and bitter at the process. We decided to adopt internationally in 1996. Through a process much too long to discuss here...we were miraculously connected with an agency from South India who place only special needs babies. For the first time we were given hope of adoption. We have two biological sons who are now 16 and 13. We got referal of our first Indian daughter when she was 4 months old. At the time CARA was restructuring in India and we were caught in the middle of it all. Because of this...she came home at age 19 months. My "failure to thrive" baby was very chubby and healthy by the time she came home. Because it worked out so beautifully for us the first time...we decided to try adoption again. Using the same agency...we were refered our second daughter when she was 5 months old. She was born with her right hip dislocated. This was beautifully fixed in India. For our second time through...the local family court judge retired and we had to wait 5 months for a new judge to come in. Anjali was 18 months old when I flew to India to bring her home. Like many other families we thought with two boys and two girls we thought we might be done...but God had other plans. Maya came into our lives when she was 5 months old. She was not desired by the local Indian couples due to her special needs diagnosis and the agency was having some difficulty finding a family to take her internationally. She was diagnosed with Atrial Septal Defect...Primary Pulmonary Hypertension and Seizures. We offered to take her if they couldn't find a family. They immediately gave us that chance. Even though the agency we use is very inexpensive...coming off of one adoption right into another one was going to be a hard financially. We are a family of very modest income. This time I decided to research grants. In Pennsylvania I found a gook called Charitable Organizations of Pennsylvania. It was 4 inches thick. I went through it one page at a time and wrote down all agencies who were permitted to give grants to individuals. Our of thousands...I found 33. I wrote to each and every one and found three grants to pay for everything. We were not permitted to send the dossier to India until the baby was 13 months old due to great delays in the family court. We entered CARA in August and was granted guardianship on December 19th. We are in the process of passport and visa right now and hope to travel to bring her home in a few weeks. She is currently 19 months old. Her heart condition has resolved itself and she has been seizure free for a year. What a blessing she is to us. So...she will make baby number 5 in our growing family. I found India to be a wonderful country to adopt from. The care of my girls was excellent. They have absolutely no bonding issues etc. Indian children are so beautiful and I found the people of South India to be the kindest most respectful that I have ever met. I had no problems at all adopting toddlers because they received all the TLC needed to creat bonding with adults. Even though all three of our children were special needs upon referal....this is no longer the case. I am one proud Mom concerning my children. My best advice to anyone checking into international adoption is to do great research. It doesn't necessarily have to cost a huge amount to adopt internationally. The big name agencies are not ALWAYS the best way to go. In every country there are the little agencies who work with volunteers etc. to keep the cost low. Just my two cents...now I'm rambling. God Bless everyone who adopts...what a wonderful addition these children are to us. Karen
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