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Jackie, you hit it right on the head when you wrote "Living a lie is an awfully hard thing to confess". That's exactly what bmom's dilemma was. I asked her what she thought would happen if people found out about me (she is 71 and I am 52). She said "They wouldn't know what to think of me. I hate liars, and this makes me a liar".
Shame has its own logic I guess.
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