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sad
Oh my goodness my heart goes out to you, A mother does not "just give away" her baby. a baby is always loved by their first mothers, always wanted. Other mothers go through Trauma too, some of us have built a wall to protect ourselves, sometimes it is easier to forget than deal with the pain. I to would not have known if my baby was a girl or boy if I didnt demand to know, that was in 1988, they didnt want to tell me, nor would they let me hold him or see him, I wanted to but I was not allowed. Doctors will do almost anything to take a baby away from its mother. It is a scientific fact that after a child is born to a woman the child and the mother are connected, a scientist actually found mother and child hormones (sorry forgot the right word) in the brains stems of each thirty years after birth. It also is a scientific fact that bonding does occur before birth and if allowed will continue on for one month (hence the primal wound) if it is severed there is no bonding only grief, this happens in mothers and children. I am not an adoptee I am an exiled mother so I cant tell you how you feel but I have felt for fourteen years the pain of a non existant limb, as if I am missing something it is very painful, most of us other mothers choose to bury that pain because of socieities thoughts...we were not suppose to care, were were just suppose to get on with our lives. It is TOTALLY impossible to get on with your life after the loss of a child. It is a death with no funeral. Other mothers create a different world were pain does not exist, we virtually walk around pretending to be different people, when really all we want to do is run to our children and hold them tight. So even though you may not feel the primal wound refered to in the book does not mean it does not exist, for the subconcious is a powerful thing.
Hugs
Mleissa
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