|
I'm also in the process of adopting our niece whom was in foster care in Idaho but now is living with us since June 30th. The ICPC is completed and the TPR trial is on August 15th. Our nieces mom is my husbands sister and she's planning on voluntarilly surrendering her rights. Nieces bio dad is on the run from the law and is getting TPR'd due to abandonment. There is alot of abuse in our nieces background (physical and sexual) so it's going to be a long road ahead but we are taking one day at a time. My SIL is currently in prison til 2008 sometime for drugs. She has now been transported close to the court where she is going to be doing the TPR trial. Last I heard she is trying to get it earlier then Aug 15th so she can move forward. I hope that is true.
Then I'll be in the adoption unit of our agency (we are licensed foster parents here) and doing an adoption home study and heading towards finalization of her adoption.
My only worry is hubby and nieces mom are somewhat close. Bio dad has threatened both my SIL and my niece (he is the abuser) and we want to protect her from any future abuse. I'm worried what type of contact my SIL will want with her daughter. Maybe when she's older (she's almost 8) it will be ok but for now I don't think anything besides letters will be appropriate.
How have other relatives dealt with this type of thing? When you know Mom was a drug addict and has been most of her life. She has not made good choices in the past regarding protecting our niece and I'm sure once she's out of jail she will go right back to the wrong crowd and drugs. This is the 2nd time that our niece has been in foster care too. The 1st time my SIL cleaned herself up to get her daughter back..even left this abusive guy...but went back to him when she got her daughter back completely. It's just awful!
And then I have Grandma on Mom's side (step grandma whom married SIL's Dad) whom lives across the country and is upset we are taking in our niece and adopting her. She wanted our niece to stay with the previous foster family so she could see her more often. We felt she should be with family. I want this to be a positive thing but it's so hard when everyone is so negative. How do you keep it upbeat and positive? Especially when it's family and you don't want to hurt anyone involved?
|