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I'm so glad I found this board. We're in the process of finishing up our foster-to-adopt license.
We're infertilie, have been trying to have a bio child for ten years now. Multiple surgeries, double digit IVF's, many m/c's and finally last fall lost of a late 2nd trimester pregnancy (terminated due to very severe birth defects).
We've got a failed domestic (birthmom decided to parent) and failed international behind us (DH is military, we just couldn't afford it, and make the travel requirements work as it turned out)
So....we've started the foster to adopt thing. But I'm really troubled by several things. Our RAD training consisted of a 2 hour class with a somewhat uniterested teacher. We looked over some handouts and did some somewhat silly exercises (pretending to be barnyard animals). We were made to read some feel-good poetry aloud...
Anyway - I feel like the agency wasnt very interested in discussing the possibility that well, sometime things don't work out and not all children can be healed with "love".
The thing that is really scaring me right now is how long these probelms seem to take to present (?)
For so many years, all I've thought about is being a mom but frankly, alot of what I'm reading makes me wonder if child-free living might be ok for us too.
Just wondering what # of adoptions actually fail or disrupt ? And what % of people who adopt regret their adoption later?
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