[shycar]

Boy what a tough desision you have to make. First on the attachment thing. My son came to us at 15 months old. In those 15 months of his life he was moved 10 times. Nope not kidding. Poor kid. I will be honest at the begining he would not let us bond with him and it was hard. He did not like to be held, he talked to anybody (that later I found out he is just a solcial bug), and had no eye contact. He was also angry and had many tantrums. But by 6 months he was not only letting us hold him, but he would hug and kiss and cuddle. By a year he had good eye contact. He still just talks to anybody, but it just his personality. Some kids dont mind strangers. He is now a loving 5yr old boy who bonds very easily. He is wonderful and Im so happy that he is our son. As a foster mom I have had many toddlers come and go. Yes they can have attachment issues, but becouse of their young age it is something that can easily be worked on. All of my toddlers have attached well with us and then well with either thier b-family when they go or thier adopted family. All have been a success with attachment.

Now age thing. LOL let me say having two that close is tough, but sooo much fun. I have my son who is 5, my foster duaghter who is 28 months, my daughter who is 19 months, and my other foster daughter who is 6 months. Its sure is crazy, but so much fun. Yes no toddler loves to share, actually that is something that any child will have to work on at any age, becouse my son sometimes does not want to share either. To think of it my hubby sometimes does not like to share. It does not matter what age your daughter is, if you adopt a baby or a toddler or a older child...she is going to have to adjust. There will be jelousy and you know the jelousy will not go away, my son still gets jelouse on occasion. Yes there will be fights between them and to be honest once there is more then one chile there will always be fights between them. I still argue with my brother and Im in my 30s. But its when they are together so happy that is the most amazing. Both girls (28 mnths and 19 mnths) love to dance. When music is on they hold eachothers hands and dance. They sit and tell eachother secrets and yes they both get into mischief together. I swear those secrets are to get into mischief. They hug eachother and kiss eachother. They even sit in time out together. If one is hurt the other comes to check on them. Sure they fight a lot, but they love being together also and have bonded well.

I know its a lot to think about. I personally love to keep siblings together, even if it means a full house. I belive this so much that we have agreed to take in the next sibling that is due in about 4 months. Yeah talk about nuts. But you and your family have to make the decision what is best for you and your family. Pray on it and let that guide you. Good luck.