[rbowman52]

I'm an adoptee from a closed adoption, so I've not been in your situation. However, I have a friend who is from an open adoption in which the different members of the triad did not keep the lines of communication open. She feels alienated and confused. She feels as though it was her fault that things fell apart.

I don't think it is healthy for any member of the triad to continue going on like this. No one is benefiting from a lack of comunication, it will only lead to more hurt, confusion and pain.

I think maybe you need a conselor, mediator or attorney to go between you and the adoptive family to work things out. Make sure that they know that you are not a threat, but an asset to their family. Have a professional tell them that it is in their and their child's interest to keep lines of communication open.

I REALLY hope things can work out and that you can come to an agreement. Don't blow it off, it really is important.

Rachel