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Originally Posted by sprunger1
Ok.. I finally have a solid question! lol
Could you give me an example of a typical day with your children? You mention that the more they do busy work, the calmer they seem.
While I'm SLOWLY learning how to make it seem that I LIKE the little things he purposely does to bother me, I still have major struggles with starting over, making him ask for everything and keeping him busy with things besides TV.
Thanks!
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With my kids it's very important to always be structured, but the thing is, you can schedule windows of free time.
For instance a typical day...
Wake up.... make their beds and get dressed.
Next they can choose playing with toys or TV. (half hour to hour, what ever suits me or until they loose interest)
If we do TV, (educational kids shows) it's ONLY TV. If they are allowed to play with toys during TV time they quickly spin out of control because they wont focus.
We try once a day to practice writing... (they can barely write thier name so we're working on it all summer)
I always try to alternate something focused like writing or reading with play and big movement. So next I'll let them go outside, they must stay in thier yard and after 3 years we are finally starting to understand boundries. They have swings, trampoline, swimming pool, bikes.... you name it. I can usually keep an eye on them from the kitchen window and it allows me to get something done.
We usually do lunch outside on the picnic table. After they've played themselves out they can come in and color, read books, or play with toys, something calmer. It's very important to give them choices and make sure they are doing one thing at a time. I usually have them tell me if they want to stop and do something else. This way they are not bouncing back and forth without focus.
I have them help set the table for dinner, and afterwards take thier plate to the sink, they just love it! The more things you give them to do, the happier they are. After dinner now that it's summer they'll usually go outside for a while.
By 7:30 or 8:00 bathtime, and I usually let them choose a movie before bed. After the movie, they'll get to choose a snack. With a RAD child, they love choosing... it's so important go give choices, it makes them feel they have some control, but yet you are the one in charge. Next they say thier prayers and they're off to bed. The more you keep things routine the better, it helps them to know what to expect and this causes them to trust.
I find that when we have a day that we go off the routine, (because of not being home, holidays, or parties) this is when we see more raging and opposition.