I don't know if this post belongs here, I'm not an adoptee or birthparent, but I am the adoptive mother of a 4 year old.
She was adopted through fostercare, but we had an open adoption with her birthmother, in fact, a very open adoption. I can't say we didn't have some rough times in the beginning, but we moved passed all of that. Her birthmom and I had daily contact, whether in person, text messaging, or by phone and our daughter, didn't have daily contact, but we had very frequent visits. I was helping her pull herself together to get her infant son out of fostercare... he was set to go home July 1st. She was murdered a few weeks ago.
Trying to get our 4 year old to understand it on her level. Expecting my text msg alert to go off any time still. Knowing our daughter won't have the opportunity to grow up knowing her birthmom as we all planned. I do thank God that I've had these last 4 1/2 years to get to know her birthmom and that I have all of these memories to relay to her when she's older and has questions.
It's just so very hard to deal with, she was young, only going to be 20 years old, and was headed in the right direction in life, and was just about to bring her son home again.
