[Carolp]

I am a birthmother in need of help. My daughter was born and adopted in 1985, I was 16 at the time. The adoption was not my choice but forced on me. I have only told a few people about her, not because I am ashamed of her because Im not, it is just so painful to talk about it. I was told that it's not something you talk about.

Now that I am older and wiser I see that not talking about it was wrong. I love her so much and I have been waiting many years until I can see her again. I have had to deal with this pain mostly by myself.

I have married and have 4 other children since then. My four children at home are 15, 14, 10 & 6. I have never told them about their half sister and dont know how. I know it is time to tell them but every time I try I just cant. My mother doesnt think I should tell them at all. I dont agree with her, I feel they have the right to know.

I'm scared, I have so many different feelings that I dont understand them. How do I start, how much information should I share with them, what if they resent me for this? If anyone can help I would appreciate it.