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gkasche,
just one more thing. I wanted to address your statement about making assumptions about people who adopt internationally instead of taking AA children here. I think your struggle is not unique when it comes to prying AA children out of the system and other who had the same experience did what you did and adopted internationally but (and it's a big but) MANY people who adopt transracially will adopt chidlren of every other race but AA and are quite upfront about that. When I asked on another bb a couple of years ago and specified people who had made that leap of adopting children that clearly would not look like them why they hadn't chosen to adopt domestically there were three reasons: fear of birth parents, fear of openness, and the most common one was a discomfort with parenting chidlren with any AA heritage. For me that means that Asian children, hispanic children, all other non white chidlren are more exceptable than AA children. I see people adopted children far darker than I am or any of my chidlren who stated in their profiles that they couldn't consider chidlren with one black grand parent. Sorry to say it but I find that incredibly messed up. And maybe I take it more personally because we are talking about chidlren who look like me and my chidlren.
I see peple being far more offended at being asked that question than they are at being asked why they didn't pursue adopting a CC infant here. When asked that, folks give very reasonable reasons but when asked why an Indian baby from Guatemala vs a biracial baby here with half the cost and half the paperwork and you get a suspicisous amout of indignation. It is these people who cast international adopters as racist. Sorry you are suffering from being painted with the same brush.
lisa
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