I am the cauc mom of two aa boys adopted at ages 3 and 4 (now ages 6.5 and 8) and bio mom of two more boys, now ages 5 and almost 2. Sooo. What do you do? Well, sometimes you respond with an appropriate answer, sometimes you ignore the stares (and eventually you dont even notice them at all) and you educate your children on what a family really means ... we dont allow ANY racism in our home (even inadvertant from older relatives) - the art, music and literature in our home is very diverse and we make lots of efforts to connect with other multiracial families. That meant for us changing churches, travelling several hours for family vacations to meet up with other adoptive families and generally making an effort. To be honest though, we have never ever dealt with overt racism. People have been inappropriately curious, asked personal questions or sometimes make too big of a deal about my sons "they are SOOOO CUTE" (which I consider reverse racism... only noticing them because of the color of their skin) but all that has lessened as the children age. I felt a need to address questions or "explain" more when the kids were first home, but now they are simply my kids, my family and if someone has a problem with that ... well I am too busy to deal with it as I am RAISING four boys
Good luck and I hope you son is home soon!