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This is Karen again...to CaliforniaJenn...to answer some of your questions...our girls did not have really any issues when them came concerning adjusting to culture/language..etc. English was understood very quickly and hand gestures work well with a toddler to get them to understand what you are talking about. As far as the development...our physician could not believe that our first daughter had been in an orphanage for the first 19 months of her life...he was very impressed as to her health and development. The girls are very smart and adjusted quickly. I make this in part due to the fact that they were born into a Hindu society which absolutely forbids drugs and alcohol. They were born clean and fed very good and healthy food from day one. My Mother-In-Law even though I wouldn't consider her a racist at all...had great reservations with adoption in general. Sejona came home 4 days before Christmas...on Christmas Eve...my Mother-in-law whispered to me how concerned and frightened she had been the whole time we waited for Sejona to come home. She was very concerned that she would not feel any bonding toward her because she was not genetically ours. I asked her then how she felt now that Sejona was here. She told me that the moment we stopped by the house on the way home from the airport and we pulled her hood back from her snow suit for Grandma and Grandpa to get a peak...she fell instantly in love with her. I traveled to India in Nov. 2000 to get our second daughter. I found the orphanage to be a very happy place. Clean and cheery. The caretakers were very kind to the babies and to me. My girls only knew this love and they sure showed it when they came here. I believe that the first year of the baby is so important. The nurture is needed for the child to bond easier later in life. I would highly recommend you reading ACRES OF HOPE by Patty Anglin. She has adopted several times both from foster care and international. She always persued children who were "waiting". One thing she said in her book that struck me as so true..."For every year of hurt a child goes through...it takes three years of love to undo the damage." She is a very good advocate for the children who have not come from the perfect environment and how it does work out to adopt them. My advice is to educate yourself. Gradually it will become crystal clear as to the adoption route you will want to go. For everyone the path is different. No one is right and no one is wrong....but everyone is in it for the children which is the most important part. I wish you well...Karen
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