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Thanks for all the support, I know that pushing it at the wrong time could permanently damage any chance of a relationship that we MIGHT have in the future. I have no intention of ruining what might be. It's the "might be" that is tearing me apart. If I KNEW he was going to want to know me in the future, I could wait easily, I have always thought of myself as a patient person. But it's harder to be patient when you don't know what the out come will be.
But as I was reading around here, another very scary question came to mind. Shirley and I have always kept in touch, oh sometimes a long time would lapse, ususally because I was going through a rough time and didn't want to burden her with that, but Jason has since that last time we communicated, (Shirley and I) made it clear that he doesn't want her to.
Now SHirley thinks I have a right to know what's going on with him and we are communicating via email. I told her I don't want her to do anything disloyal to him, but now I wonder, what if he finds out?
I mean I won't push at HIM, but I have always relied on SHirley to let me know how he's doing. Am I going to risk that possible further contact with him by staying in touch with her? and what if he never wants to know me, at least then I know how and what he's doing through Shirley. How on earth can I make that decision????
BUt don't worry about my trying to push yet. It is frustrating to know how much I could help him if he were just open to it. But the thing about helping someone is that he (or she) must want that help! Otherwise, it is just a waste of time.
I am, at present looking for a psychiatrist, mostly because I am in a new area, and was diagnosed with ADD several years ago, and need to have my meds prescribed and I am having other difficulties as well. So I imagine that Jason will be a significant part of the therapy part of my treatment.
I am putting this at the bottom in case it's not allowed....but if it is.....I am looking for a psychiatrist who specializes in adult ADD in the San Fransisco Bay area. I'll drive any amount to find such a specialist!
Once again, thank you for your ideas and support. This site has already been a big help for me
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