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Here's the thing with open adoption....they aren't all the same.
I've heard on here many times the whole "your agreement was with birthmom and no one else" comment, but that is just not always the case.
In our situation, we have been just as involved with Birthmom's sister and mother as we have with m's Birthmom. I would not hesitate for a second to send updates to them if T asked for no more contact.
Open adoption CAN entail more than just the immediate birthparents. It sounds like in your case, you were quite involved with this friend. It is not fair or realistic to think that you have to now just shut these people off.
If you are comfortable with sending pics, send them. If you aren't, then don't.
I don't think a birthparent has the right to dictate relationships just because she is the one who brought you together.
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Leigh
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