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Thank you
I am still in councilling, anger is not the hardest part of what I am dealing with, the confusion is phenominal. I dont have a clue what they know about me, When I recieved my sons adoption order what they wrote on me was totally backwards, right down to the colour of my hair and my age. I dont know if I stated this but I did say that I wrote the parents a letter too. The reason why I wrote my son was on advice from my therapist and my support group (which includes adoptee's and adoptive parents). The main reason why I wrote directly to him and then to his parents was to make sure that he knew that I found him, yes they are his parents, he is not a little baby, he is a teenager. NO I dont want to contact him until he is ready and he asks me to be apart of his life. He is capable of making that decision. He is capable of saying no I dont want to meet her, or yes I do. Again he is not a child that needs to be coddled and protected. I am raising three children all of them are VERY aware of their brother, confused about him not being under our roof but they know him as their brother. We as a family go to councilling together, we also go to support group meetings. For they are very much involved. Adoption does affect everyone in my family. The reason why I wanted to converse with his parents is because I dont want them to misunderstand were I am coming from. I do want to get to know them and them me for the sake of "our" son. He is not a possession, yet it seems to me that this is the way they feel. Teenage years are troubled, adoptive teens have an even harder time because they have a harder time "finding" their identity. It is a proven fact that involving the other family helps the adoptee deal with the identity crisis they go through as teenagers. This may sound funny to you, but I know my son needs me I can feel it. I hear him, I feel him
Hugs
Melissa
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