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Re
I said what I said because the most important thing for these children is that the family unit stay intact. Broken homes don't do any one any good. There really are no easy answers here. I don't advocate lying, of course it isn't right. Sometimes we make mistakes, doozies even, and it isn't always in the best interests of everyone to assuage our guilt by exposing the secret. Since I don't know the original poster or her husband, it is really hard to advise.
My opinion is that she should keep this secret because it could be a life destroyer. It really depends on how forgiving her husband is. People do come back as a couple from infidelity. And having known children from broken homes where the cause was infidelity, no they haven't seen that parent as more human, they've viewed them as weak, and one thing I heard from one man was that he felt his father not only betrayed his mother but the entire family. Who really can say what the children would think on down the road?
I think the best thing she should do is to seek therapy and let a qualified M&FT guide her into what would be the best course of action; keep the secret or tell her husband.
Whatever she decides I wish her and her family the best. I really hope that healing can be found for her and if needs be the family.
God Bless!
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