[Stormster]

I'm glad to learn everything I have on this thread, I don't know anything about the term and have never thought about it.

I realize it is the PBM's choice whether or not to go through with an adoption. And as a woman I respect and honor that choice and would not want to pursue an adoption with anyone who had serious doubts about it.

But I do worry about us too. I am glad in our State NY, we are not permitted to pay more than 3 months living expenses to PBM's (in private adoption) and one of the months is supposed to be post partum.

I think that protects us a lot. But PBM's are protected too because of the rigorous licensing system.

I do think New York tries to make it fair to everyone BUT I have one complaint.

With all these private adoptions taking place, who is educating the PBM'S about counseling? I know a good attorney would make sure she knew about the expenses, revoking rights etc, but so far we have never been told to offer a PBM counseling. Who is regulating that? We can ask for medical records, ask for drug testing...it doesn't seem right not to automatically offer counseling! It would help to protect everyone involved but particularly the PBM.

Thanks. PS We are doing the private route and will always offer counseling. I believe the reimbursement is in addition to the general living expenses....I'm 99%sure about that. I'M SORRY IF I GOT ANYTHING WRONG I'M NOT AN EXPERT BUT THIS IS WHAT WE'VE SEEN SO FAR.