[marythemom]

We've been having a lot of trouble getting kids to complete chores, and since I quit my job we had to let the cleaning lady go so there are even more chores needing to be done! We finally came up with something that seems to be working. My 13 year old goes rollerblading every Friday and needs $8 to go. He also wants money for drinks and extra lunch money. He was probably the worst about not doing his chores, giving attitude, or not doing them well, and this has really helped.

Dh and I came up with a list of about 30 chores that needed doing. In a family meeting we sat down and had the KIDS choose which chores they wanted. New dd hates chores and is not highly money motivated. She chose the least amount of chores and I'm fine with that. Youngest ds who'll be 8 next week chose the next highest amount of chores.

Some chores everyone gets, but we chose which day (cleaning up puppy messes wasn't getting done because it was never anyone's turn - now they clean up messes if it's their day - and they're much more likely to get up and put the puppy outside on "their" day!). They have a laundry day where they wash and put away their laundry (that way the machine doesn't have a line - and they don't have that excuse). Everyone's room must be clean and ready for inspection at 6pm on Fridays (coincidentally, right before oldest ds wants to be taken to rollerblading). If their room isn't clean then they don't get to go anywhere on the weekend.

I love this system because when they complain about doing a chore I get to say "Well you chose to do this chore, but you certainly don't have to do it! Someone else would be happy to make the extra money." - even if it's Thursday and they've been doing the chore all week, the other person gets the "full" amount. We've decided a chore that has to be done every day - like dishes and feeding the dogs gets $2 a week. Things a child does 3 times a week or less -like cleaning the bathroom or doing laundry - they get $1 a week. We haven't let the children in on how the money part works - we just told them what they'd get based on their total chosen chores. Some things like doing their laundry and cleaning their rooms were not chosen chores those are part of living in a family, but if they complain about them they'll get a similar answer. "You can choose not to do that chore and have no clothes (and no sympathy), or you can pay someone else to do it (and they won't be happy with $1-2 dollars). For most chores if they're not done they're grounded until the chore is done.

So far it's working for us.
Mary (stay at home mom to T -8 next week!, K 10.5, C 11.75 and D 13.5)