[victorialady]

My last post on here was 12/10/06. I wanted to update you since then.

My adopted mother passed away on 12/14/06 very suddenly. We had not spoken for 2 years. She was not a nice lady and I'm not so sure she did me any favors by adopting me.

It's been a very difficult time for me since she passed away. I can't really say I miss her, but I do hope and pray she is at peace.

What's been difficult for me is to learn she did not leave me anything. I was an only child, but I found out she left everything to her neighbor/caregiver. It's a long story and I won't bore you with it, but the gist of the story is the neighbor/caregiver gave her the attention and "played the game" that my mother liked. I never knew how to do that with her, hence, I got nothing.

At first, I was hurt and angry. My mother loved to tell people how much she "loved" me but in reality she did everything she could to drive me away from her. I got to the point, two years ago, when she told me she made a big mistake by adopting me, that I couldn't take her verbal abuse any more and I didn't have any contact with her since then. I know...I know....I'm getting what I deserve.

My point in all this is.....I've finally made a decision about changing my name. I've decided to do it. I may be 60 (but look and feel 40!), and my husband thinks I've lost my mind, but I just don't want the "tie" to her any more. I don't know what the circumstances were that my "real" mother gave me up, and I'll probably never know, but I want my "identity" back. I want the name I was born with. That's the name I want to die with.

I hope I don't sound too crazy! LOL

Just thought I'd update this in case anyone is interested.