|
I think a big part of raising children is just loving them with your whole heart, giving them a great foundation and then as they are ready to spread their wings being able to let them go.
lol....I think your biggest concern when it comes to future issues like that shouldn't be the birthfamily but your childs husbands family.
In the world we live in today with family moving all over the country or even world, it will be impossible for your child to be with you every holiday and by then their will be other realtives that need visiting other than just Mom and Dad.
As long as you raise your children with lots of love and the best way you know how your children will always know where HOME is. They will always see you as MOM and DAD because that is who you will ALWAYS be to them. But as our kids get older and get married they also get another MOM and DAD (a mother and father in Law) will they call them MOM and DAD (maybe). Will they want to see them a lot (maybe). Does that relationship diminish your role in your childs life? (No) You will always be the parent she grew up with. You will be in all her memories. Your influence on her will have guided her entire life, schooling, achievements, beliefs, gestures, figures of speech etc etc.
You will NEVER be the mother who gave your child life. But don't focus on what you won't be able to give your baby. Rather, focus on what you can give your child. On your special place as MOTHER/MOMMY in your childs life forever. A position that his/her birthmother will never be able to fill or take away from you, just as you can't take her place as birthmother to the child.
Just because your future child may call her mother-in-law "Mom" does not mean the mother-in-law will fill your place. They will have their own special connection. Their own special relationship and memories together. Just as a birthmom will have her own special connection, relationship and memories. She will never fill your shoes and your place in your childs heart.
But part of raising a child is allowing the child to grow up. To build relationships with others outside the immediate family, inside their extended family, community and the world. But if we give them a solid foundation they will always know where HOME is and know that they will always be loved and welcome there.
|