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You have no idea how nice it is to find we are not alone with less than supportive family.
It astounds me that these people, feel they have the right much less the audacity to pose such rude and hurtful questions to us. I took an extremely firm stance with my family. This is OUR choice, not theirs. Our children mean more to us than they do. If they can not accept our child, then they are not welcome in my home.
My dh and I are currently the proud parents of 3 bio children, 2 boys and 1 beautiful daughter with spina bifida.
My mil actually asked us this question.
"What if, when you get the baby home, there is something wrong with it?"
WHAAA??? "It"?? It's my baby, what do you think I am going to do with "it". I am going to find every resource available to me and every doctor that is needed to care for whatever could possibly be wrong.
What kind of mother do these people think I am?
DH and I have been married for 10 years, I would think that they know me better than that.
What I find the hardest to combat is my grandparents. They are in their 80's and set in their ways. Grandma asked me just last week , "will the baby be white?".
GROAN. While I don't want to deny my grandparents their great-grandchildren, I also will not stand for any preferential treatment. I will not allow our adopted daughter to be shunned or shirked in anyway shape or form. I often wonder if this is too harsh. But really, what kind of parent would I be if I let such things happen. As it stands, I seriously doubt they will still be here to see this newest addition, but I can't predict the future.
I have many thoughts about why people don't adopt in the US. Many which aren't nice. When we decided to adopt, I called 3 different domestic agencies. I was told that I would never be chosen by a birth-family. Why you ask? Because I already had children of my own.
The children in other countries less developed than our own, in my opinion, are in greater need of adoption than those in the states.
In fact, to naysayers...Until you have walked a mile in my shoes...please stay out of them.
I think I have ranted enough.
For those who read all of that, God Bless you.!
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