An article appeared in the Atlanta paper by a child psychologist named John Rosemond that contained some clever responses and insight to statements such as "adopted", "given up for adoption", "real parents", "natural parents", "is this child your own?":
Here is the link to the article on John Rosemond's website:
Weekly Column
Here are some of the highlights:
1)
Adopted - verb, "My child was adopted" - so I guessing saying "is adopted" is not correct since an adoption has taken place and has been completed.
2) "
Given up for adoption" - children are not objects and therefore cannot be given, people make adoption plans or choose adoption for a child.
3) "
Real Parents" - As opposed to imaginary parents?
4) "
Natural Parents" - Aren't we all natural parents and supernatural at times? Our children have only one set of parents.
5) "
Is this child your own?" - You'll have to read the article for the response, but trust me that the response will leave the person who asked the original question a little dumbfounded.
I'm sure the list of questions/comments that adoptive parents hear is numerous. Here are a few questions/comments from other posts in this forum:
1) "
Where is your child from?" - Response: "my child is from [insert where you live]. If you meant, where was he/she born, he/she was born in Guatemala." Would this same person ask the same question of your biological child? That would be quite comical - "Well, I'm from Georgia, but I was born in Texas. My child is also from Georgia, but was born in Florida."
2) "
How much did he/she cost?" - I still haven't figured out how I will best answer this question, but I know that part of the response should be something along the lines of: "my child did not cost anything, he/she is not an object that can be purchased."
3) "
Where are his/her real parents?" - Response, "We are his/her parents" See "real parents" above.
4) "
You know what I meant." - Response: I answered the questions that you asked me. So, no, I don't know what you meant.
And one question that an American teenager asked me in the Guatemala City airport during our most recent trip:
1) "Is it easy to adopt from Guatemala?" - My response, "The process of adoption is not 'easy' no matter where you choose to adopt from." What I wanted to say, "First, can you say it any louder here in the airport in front of a bunch of Guatemalans? Second, how much time do you have for me to explain how 'easy' this process is not?"
Please add other questions that you have been asked and include both your actual responses and what you really wanted to say.