Hi,
I am an adoptee who has been reunited (unofficially- 10 yrs) and face to face for 5 yrs. I never told my adoptive parents about search/reunion because of the reaction I *would* have got from them. I've since missed my chance. They are both deceased now.
Would it have been easier on you if your children had not involved you with the reunion?
I have a couple of regrets now. #One, that I brought my husband and children into the secret keeping. I do feel badly that I put them into the middle of all this, and threatened them to keep my secrets from MIL / Granny.
#2- That I've forever missed my chance to stand up for myself with them. I feel like a coward at times- but deep down, I guess I absolutely feared and dreaded any rejection from my aparents. I wish I had been strong enough to tell them I was going to have my original family in my life, like it or not. 
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adoptee reunited WITHOUT state, court, judge, agency, or amom approval. Woohoo!
I have my OBC!! pfffffffft!
I missed her, I missed my siblings, I missed the connection, the identity, the ethnic background, the medical history..... I lost something very important in my life for 40 plus years. I am thankful to finally have all that back
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